“Don’t sweat the small stuff,” they say. Taking each small thing in a vacuum, I couldn’t agree more. The sweat, of course, starts flowing when small thing piles on small thing, until you reach the proverbial backbreaking straw. A ton of feathers still weighs a ton. In order to wash off some of my sweat, here are a few small things that have me a bit riled up:
Why are Americans so offended by breasts? Save for the poor souls who grew up without a mother able or willing to breast feed, we’ve all sucked on them at one point or another. How can such a natural, normal part of life be perceived with such rage? My wife and I celebrated our seventh anniversary yesterday by taking lunch at our favorite Thai restaurant. We first dined here shortly after they opened, and were impressed by the remarkable atmosphere which included some beautiful—if possibly inauthentic—Asian paintings. Paintings with breasts. The horror. They’re gone now, replaced by mass-produced Pottery Barn-worthy “artwork.” The waiter confirmed it was due to a customer complaint. And this is in one of the most liberal towns in America.
Praise the Lord’s Status
Two of my friends’ recently-posted Facebook statuses have proven to be a great exercise in self-restraint. The first one appeared yesterday on the profile of a friend who recently injured his knee:
_____ is praying for healing. Being in constant pain is no fun.
Pray all you like, buddy. You’d have better luck with Vicodin. It was all I could do to keep myself from commenting with just that sentiment. And it’s definitely a good thing I didn’t… Three of his local (Bible Belt) friends responded with various “we’re praying for you too”s.
The other friend’s status is so wrong on so many levels:
_____'s boys are still super congested and coughing horribly, but praise God they're in good moods!
Yes, praise God for smiting my children with illness but having the decency to keep their spirits up. Such a merciful, loving god. Oh but wait… Them being sick is all part of His plan, of course. So, what if they were miserable? Would you still be praising the Lord who made them suffer in the first place? Just goes to show there’s no room for honesty in religion. Hypocrisy is the rule.
Dirty Pillows! They're unfit to be seen by anyone!ReplyDelete
People really are nuts over boobs, even when it comes to people who claim to be open-minded. Geesh, they're just bags of fat and milk glands, the purpose of which are to feed babies. People need to get a grip. Funny how so many on the RW practically worship portraits of "war heroes" with assault rifles in their hands yet have the vapors over a woman with her breasts showing. Such a sad skewing of priorities.
And prayer is one of the best ways to feel like you're moving mountains while doing nothing at all. Don't bother to get out there and actually feed the homeless, just pray for them and pretend you're their best friends. Sick and depraved when you think about it.